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May 20th, 2006

старое, но милое

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
________________________________________________
TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
_________________________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using table
_________________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
TEACHER: No, that's wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
________________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
________________________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't
have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
_________________________________________________
TEACHER: Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
________________________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE: I is...
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE: All right.... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
________________________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,
but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand?
________________________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook.
_________________________________________________
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your
brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, teacher. It's the same dog.
________________________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.
האותיות ומשמעותן ע"פ הקבלה

א-לוגיקה ,ראשוניות ,היגיון
ב-ברכה וגם הגבלה
ג-תקשורת ויצירתיות
ד-אנרגיה
ה-מזל ,התלהבות
ו-יציבות
ז-מצד אחד אות מיוחסת ומיסטית ומצד שני-אות של מלחמה
ח-ביתיות והגנה
ט-הכוח של השמש ,טוב
י-עזרה לזולת
כ-נדיבות
ל-לימודים
מ-רגשנות
נ-עקשנות
ס-סגירות
ע-לימודים מעמיקים
פ-יופי וגם גרגרנות
צ-מתן בסתר
ק-מופנמות
ר-תקשורת וסקרנות
ש-אש, אנרגיה
ת-משפחתיות

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